the private sector and not puttingnenough into the public one. He callsnfor more money for schools, drugnrehabilitation programs, and better policenforces; less for ski weekends, pizza,nand hunting weapons. He chastisesngovernment for failing to represent theninterests of the community. Yet surelynthe burden of the preceding chapters isnthat America is no longer a communitynin any fair sense of the word. And ifnAmericans are collectively a lot of dopenand television addicts, alcoholics, fastfoodngluttons, adulterers, pornographers,nwife-betrayers, and childabusers,nwhy should the governmentnspend the money and the effort to bailnthem out of the rewards of their ownnself-indulgence? (Incidentally, doesnMr. Collier truly believe that it isnprimarily affluent people, rather thannindigent ones, who are guilty of selfishness?nWith the exception of the flocksnof mental patients released from theirnpsycho wards in response to suitsnbrought by civil-rights activists, the majoritynof the sainted “homeless” arensimply misfits, drunks, and crackheadsn— what even in the Great Depressionnwere known as “bums” and “hobos.”)nThis is the first in a series of columnsnaddressing the moral dilemmas of life atnthe end of a millennium. Letters, whichnshould be sent to Miss Morals c/onChronicles, will be kept in strictestnconfidence.nI’ve been reading advice columnistsnall my life. In fact, they (along with thencomics) are about the only things I readnin the newspapers. Back in the 1950’s,nthe advice being ladled out was thenpredictable, soft-edged sermonizingnyou’d hear from a junior pastor or ancamp counselor: don’t drink or smoke,ndon’t talk back to your mother, and nonmatter what he tells you in the backseatnat the drive-in, he will not respect younin the morning. It was as thin andnunexciting as skim milk, but it was alsonsafe and ultimately nutritious.nBut all that has changed. Starting innthe 60’s, Ann and Abby began to swing:ninstead of chastity, they recommendednsex with commitment; instead of maritalnfidelity, they dwelt on the need tonescape from troubled marriages. Youndon’t have to imagine what kind ofnpeople were willing to take this advice;nThe trouble is that James LincolnnCollier, like so many old-fashionednAmerican liberals, is also a bit of anpuritan. He deplores the fact that,n”Today . . . alcohol is a norm in thenlives of the majority” and credits thendoughboys’ furlough in France — “anculture in which wine was served withnmeals, even breakfast in some cases;nwhere brothels were legal and taken forngranted” — with having further erodednVictorian morality. Yet France in 1917nwas a civilized country no less than-thenUnited States, and probably not moren”selfish.” Hence the question: is Collier’snthesis regarding the rise of selfishnessna variant of the old theory ofnAmerican exceptionalism?nIs it the case, in other words, thatnwine-drinking, relaxed sexual mores,ncomparative laziness, and the temptationsnof urban life were intrinsicallynfatal to American society, but not tonEuropean ones? Is it a fact that tipplingnand fornication were controllable innthe Calabria of the 19th century butnnot in the New York or Chicago of thatntime? One might argue that if Frenchmen,nItalians, and Spaniards had drunknless wine and made less love, thennASK MISS MORALSnyou can see them every day in singles’nbars, in divorce court, or on Phil ornOprah.nAll this time I have been thinking:nwhy can’t you ever read some realnadvice — not the gooey stuff about safensex or even the milk-and-water recommendationsnon what nice girls do andndon’t do. Why can’t we read the kind ofnadvice that was once inscribed in stone,nemblazoned in scarlet letters, or brandednonto faces. Something like “Thounshalt not commit adultery.” A plain,nsimple no. Today we are more likely tonread something like, “Don’t tell yournhusband, because what he doesn’t knownwon’t hurt you.”nRecently a divorced woman in hern40’s wrote to Ann or Abby to confessnthat she had been seduced by “ragingnhormones” into sleeping with a friend’snhusband. She was crazy, she admitted,nand—get this—she now believes henlied to her, when he told her he lovednher. What was the answer? Somethingnlike, “you’re a very wise lady who hasnher act together. Divorcees take warning!”nnnFrance, Italy, and Spain might havenshared in that transaflantic decencynand sobriety that was Anglo-AmericannVictorianism. On the other hand, sobrietynand decency breed efficiency,nwhich makes possible the great economicnmachine that creates the greatncities that produce the spoiled, selfish,nand detached loners of whom Mr.nCollier complains.nThe truth is that the selfishness thatnCollier deplores is not a peculiarlynAmerican problem but a necessaryncondition of the mass industrial stateneverywhere — in Europe, in Asia, innLatin America, even in Africa. Humannsociety, it appears, is able to accommodatensmall laxities of behavior so long asna traditional framework continues tonsurround it: family, church, and community.nOnce that framework is removed,nvenialness and vice togethernwith harmless enjoyment become dangerousncompulsions, and pleasure itselfnan addiction. The modern way ofnliving, it must be obvious, is not thenhuman one. Why should we benshocked to find it producing somethingnless than what we like to think of asnhuman behavior? <£>nHow’s that again? This is what younsay to a woman whose greatest regret isnthat she failed to break up a friend’snmarriage? Miss Morals has a slightlyndifferent perspective on the problem.nCan this woman have really lived forn45 years without hearing that men arendeceivers? Is she really the victim or anfailed criminal? Even in an age ofnsexual liberation, we owe certain thingsnto our friends. This lady would probablynnever dream of stealing her friend’snteaspoons or borrowing her car withoutnasking. What makes her think she’snjustified in borrowing, much less stealing,nher husband? Chastity belts arenpasse, but this is the age of medicalnremedies for moral diseases. If she can’tncontrol her raging hormones, she mightnconsider corrective surgery: have hernknees pierced and bolted together.nYou get the idea. Although MissnMorals does not intend to insult herncorrespondents, she is not afraid to benjudgmental, and if no one writes in, shencan always live off Ann-and-Abby’s tablenscraps for years to come.nMARCH 1992/31n