belongs to Mrs. Schlafly—the ability ton”take life’s lemons and make lemonade.”n:o make the best of things, not in a passive,nresigned sense but in an almost aggressivenfashion. Where a feministnwould sit. Victorian fashion, and bewailnlife’s cruelty, Phyllis Schlafly turns disadvantageninto asset. Of her working/ncollege stint, she comments:n… the most wonderful two years ofnmy life—a unique experience.nI can think of few people who couldncomplete three years (she had been atnMarvv’iUe College for her freshman year)nof college in two. work full time, graduatenPhi Beta Kappa and call the wholenepisode “wonderful.”nOne might say that Mrs. Schlafly isndecisive. The most common definitionnof that word is the ability to make decisions.nBut in Phyllis it takes on a slightlyndifferent meaning: she has “decided”nthat life works out well for her. Withnan incisive intelligence she can size upna situation and quickly recognize whatnis inevitable and what can be changed.nWhen she has altered it in whatever waynshe can, she simply decides to be pleasednwith the result. Rather than yearn fornthe unattainable, she either attains itnor she makes up her mind to be happynwith what she has. It’s an enviable ability—andnone which is totally at oddsnwith the current fashion of navel-contemplatingnor psychoanalysis, whereinnone searches for culprits on whom tonplace the blame for one’s problems orndeficiencies. It’s an attitude that getsnmore results than self-pity does.nThis factor, I think, is what lies behindnher profound contempt for feminists.nIn Phyllis’s eyes these “ladies”nstand around complaining about eitherntrivialities or conditions that could benchanged if only they were willing to putnforth some effort. In her view feministsnwould rather shout, march, demonstrate,nharangue and call names thannwork to prove themselves. PhyllisnSchlafly’s own life would seem to provenher point. Which, of course, is why shenso infuriates the members of NOW andntheir cohorts. Besides being intelligentnand aniculate, her argument is irrefutable:n”I did it years ago—why can’tnyou.””nI find myself liking this exemplarynlady, although I am awed by her intelligencenand a little intimidated by hernaccomplishments; her self-disciplinenmakes me feel lazy. I wish, though, thatnshe’d admit to some venial sin—thatnshe sneaks Twinkles when no one isnlooking, or that she secretly watchesnTV soap operas. She never would, ofncourse, but somehow I still think shenis human. Phyllis Schlafly applies hernmany talents in so many ways becausenshe cares. She is deeply concerned aboutneverything in which she has been involved,nfrom her college career to hernchildren, from national defense to theninfamous ERA. For Phyllis, an issuenthat she believes to be important willnalways impel her involvement. She willnforever feel the need to do whatever shencan to improve the lives of those aroundnher—in her neighborhood or in thenworld.nIhere is, however, one concernnwhich must be mentioned. Phyllis tendsnto forget that not all women live thenway she does. By dint of her superiornbackground, training and intelligence,nMrs. Schlafly has always been very muchnin control of her own life. But there arenmany, many women about whom thatncarmot be said. Some women—yes, evennvirtuous ones—are sexually harassed atntheir places of employment; some husbandsndo abuse or abandon their wives.nTo these women, Phyllis Schlafly seemsnto have nothing to say. She inhabits anworld where such things simply do notnhappen, so she can speak meaningfullynonly to the women of her own world.nOf course. Friedan, Steinem, et al.nhave even less to say to the true unfortunatesnamong females. They mouthnenthusiastic slogans, but in fact theynhelped to create the very conditions theynclaim to deplore. When the stridentnshouts of feminism went out across thenland, when sexual independence wasnproclaimed for women, it actually liberatednmore men than women. They feltn’liberated” from their responsibilitiesnas husbands and fathers: “If she can doneverything, well, then, let her” was thenattitude taken by not a few. It “liberated”nmany, perhaps even most, men from thenbonds of what was once called chivalryn—which extends far beyond openingndoors or relinquishing a seat on a bus.nWomen leaped down from their pedestalsnonly to find the ground beneathnmuddy and treacherous. Feminists attemptnto convince us that mud is fine,nbeneficial, fun. Mrs. Schlafly would saynthat we have only to climb back up thenmarble steps—but she does not noticenthat there are some who are too weaknto do so.nPhyllis Schlafly is on the right track,nof course, but the questions of men andnwomen, marriage and families remainncomplex. One hopes, finally, that whennERA is buried once and for all, she willnturn her prodigious abilities to definingnand explicating these cultural complexities.nPerhaps then she can speak tonand for women other than only her ownnkind. DnWhat should a businessman, an executive, a corporate officerntake into consideration when he thinks about himself, hisnfamily, his business, the world around him?nPersuasion At Work offers options to think about.nnnFOR SUBSCRIPTION INFORMATION SEE PAGE 34.nSeptember/October 1981n