additional weighty commitments.rnThe KSE Promise, its title written inrnfaux kid-print (no backward “s,” mercifully),rnappeared next to the pledge. Thernfollowing is what our family had to notrnonly recite together but mean:rnThe Earth is my home.rnI promise to keep itrnhealthy and beautiful.rnI will love the land,rnthe air,rnthe water,rnand all livingrncreatures.rnI will be a defenderrnof my planet.rnUnited with friends,rnI will save the Earth.rnA big arrow pointing to a dotted line wasrnaccompanied by another phony kidscrawlrndirecting us to “cut off the signedrnpart and turn it in to your teacher atrnschool.” Below the line were six signaturernlines headed “Signed, the membersrnof this family.”rnThe proposal was so offensive to mernon so many levels that I found it impossiblernto describe my objections to thisrnprinted bit of idiocy in a coherent fashion.rnHowever, I told my son I would berncalling his teacher to say that I would notrnbe signing any pledge and that I wasrnreasonably sure that his dad, an inveteraternmisanthrope and animal hater,rnwould not be signing it either. Hisrnsister, a teenage barracuda, was also arnpoor recruitment prospect. Furthermore,rnI expected him to be able to participaternfully in all academic programs,rnincluding awards for achievement,rnirrespective of what he, his parents,rnsister, dog, and mosquito fish do or dornnot believe about the environment orrnanything else. Finally, I believed thernprogram to be unconstitutional and arnviolation of his civil rights and felt itrnprobably violated school board policy.rnMy son had just one response: “Whatrnabout my T-shirt?”rnI called my son’s teacher and expressedrnmy distress about the program’srncommercial bribery, political correctness,rnand unconstitutionality to no avail.rnThe fact that I am a lawyer and knewrnwhat I was talking about did not seem tornmake much of an impression. “This is anrnissue we all have to deal with,” she explained,rnmeaning environmental destruction,rnnot thought control. I toldrnher I expected my son to be able to participaternfully in all academic programsrnregardless of his family’s willingness tornsign a moronic pledge. To the extentrnthat the program was political and notrnacademic, I objected to it.rnThen there was the T-shirt, which isrnall my son wanted out of the program. Irntherefore somewhat lamely added thatrnmy son should not be deprived of a Tshirtrnbecause of his parents’ political beliefs.rnThe teacher said she thought sherncould adapt the program requirementsrnsomewhat, but I hung up the phonernsensing defeat.rnMy fears were confirmed when myrnson returned home the following dayrnwith the news that he could obtain a Tshirtrnif we wrote and signed our ownrnpledge. I called the principal.rnAgain, I ran through my objections tornthe whole Target proposal: bribing childrenrnto adopt a point of view, punishingrnchildren for the beliefs of their parents,rnand abandoning an information-basedrncurriculum for one with a political agenda.rnI added that my son could do whatrnhe wanted regarding the pledge but thatrnno one else in the family would be signingrnanything and that our position wasrnnot open to negotiation. Also, my sonrnwould like his T-shirt. The principal saidrnhe would get back to me.rnPerhaps now is the time to concedernthat my son, whom I carried in myrnwomb for nine long months and tornwhom I gave birth after a long and difficultrnlabor, was profoundly embarrassedrnby my activism and took his teacher’srnside in this dispute. To him, the virtuousrnside seemed obvious: his teacher was forrnthe environment, and I was not. Also,rnhis teacher could get him a certificate forrna free T-shirt, and I could not. Then,rntoo, he was afraid his teacher would haternhim if I threw a tantrum over the proposal.rnFinally, there was proof in numbers.rnOf all the families with children inrnthe class, ours was the only one to objectrnto the program on philosophicalrngrounds. “Why do you always have tornturn everything into a public war?” hernwailed.rnSoon the principal called to say thatrnmy son could qualify for his T-shirt if hernwrote and signed his own pledge. However,rnthe pledge had to contain a statementrnthat he promised to encouragernothers to recycle—that is to say, thernpledge could not really be his. Additionally,rnhe felt my objections to the programrnwould be more appropriately directedrnto Target. I then called a memberrnof the school board.rnMeanwhile, against my wishes, my sonrnbegan working on his pledge. Friday, Tshirt-rnwearing day, was nigh, as was thernTarget deadline for converting certificatesrninto rewards. His pledge read asrnfollows:rnI believe recycling should be a necessity.rnI pledge to walk to school,rnto carpool, to recycle, to not destroyrnanimals’ homes, and to notrnlitter.rn”This is the living end,” I thought tornmyself as I watched him selling hisrnbirthright to independent thought for arnlousy T-shirt. He returned home thernnext afternoon with his prized certificate.rnMy son was happy, but I was not.rnThe school board member saw thernproblems with the program right away.rnHowever, she is a controversial figurernwhose point of view is in the minority onrnthe board. I told her that, in a fit of irrationality,rnI had contemplated contactingrnthe American Civil Liberties Union,rneven though the ACLU had just sentrnme a form fundraising letter boastingrnthat it would use my donation to battlernpeople fitting my exact political profile,rn”I don’t know,” she said of the possibility.rn”They’re a real can of worms.”rnHowever, she did present the Targetrnmaterial to an administrator in charge ofrncurriculum, who later responded that Irnwas being unreasonable. “The pledge isrnno different from the anti-drug and alcoholrnpledges that students are asked tornsign,” she replied. Furthermore, accommodationsrnwere made for our family,rnand those accommodations should havernresolved any problems. Another schoolrnboard member echoed these sentimentsrnbut suggested that the issue be referredrnto the school corporation’s lawyer to seernif my son’s civil rights were being violated.rnThe ultimate verdict: the Target programrnhad to go.rnGrinning, I told my son that Momrnhad been proven correct. My positionrnhad been validated by the lawyers—hisrncivil rights had indeed been violated,rnand in some small way we had beatenrnback the forces of tyranny.rn”You sound like a liberal,” he retortedrnunhappily. He continued to worry thatrnhis teacher would hate him. But hernhasn’t worn the T-shirt since.rnBetsy Clarke writes from Carmel,rnIndiana.rn50/CHRONICLESrnrnrn